Category: Helpful Resources

10 Secrets for the Man in the Mirror

by Patrick Morley

 

– To succeed at work but fail at home is to failure all together.

– Enjoy the present progress instead of worrying about the future unknown.

– We can grow because of suffering, but we must be careful not to suffer from the wrong things. Most men suffer from the following three things: marriage, money and media.

– Encouragement is food for the heart and most men are dying of starvation.

– Many men know about God but do not really know God.

– Do what you don’t necessarily want to do so that you can become what you want to be.

– The more you give away, the happier you will be.

– Steward your time and responsibilities according to what you have, not according to what you want.

– You will find your happiness by helping others find their happiness. True happiness is only in God, so helping someone else find God is helping them find their true happiness.

– If your actions do not line up with your belief system, you might not believe the right thing.

– Humor is an antidote to stress and lightens everything up.

– If you want to be loved, start loving others.

4 Essential Keys to Effective Communication

by Bento C. Leal III

 

– If you are like the average person, you want to have good relationships. Good relationship don’t come by accident, they come with work and overtime, and your communication will make your relationships much better.

– Empathy is an essential relationship ingredient.

• Empathy is to see from another persons point of view and put yourself in their shoes.

• Sympathy is to feel for someone or something, but empathy is to see from their point of view.

4 Empathic awareness skills:

Key One: Each person is unique, special and valuable.

– Fill your mind with positive self-talk instead of negative, it will come out.

– Your thoughts produce your actions.

– Recognize the dignity of others, they are worthy of respect.

– Each person is placed in our life for a specific reason. There’s something that we can learn from them and something that we can teach them.

– Each person has their strengths and weaknesses, their good things and quirks, but each person is unique, special and valuable.

– Each person has something that they can teach us and help us grow, so see them that way.

– Act loving and you will feel loving. You are more apt to act and then feel instead of trying to feel and then act.

– See everyone you come in contact with as a person that can help you grow in your love, patience, forgiveness and gratitude.

– To the world you may be just one person, but to one person you may just be the world.

– Think of the positives in your relationship with that person.

 Key Two: Most people do not listen to understand, they listen to reply.

– Much of communication is not verbal, it is eye contact, body language, etc.

– Because many people do not listen fully to the other person, they respond according to their assumption and not according to what the other person said.

– Listen to the feelings of the person and not only to the words. If you listen only to the words, you might miss something.

– Listening is really an active action.

– Interrupting when someone is speaking to finish their thoughts or give your advice will cause frustration.

– Let the person finish even if you think you know what they’re going to say. This will help and shows respect.

– Repeat back what the person said. This will avoid pitfalls and misunderstandings. It also shows that you think what the other person said was important enough to both listen and repeat back what was said.

– Connect with emotions and feelings by listening.

– Listen and don’t worry about offering advice.

– A sincere apology as an opener may be the exact thing needed to start a good conversation and have a good relationship.

– An apology works wonders to fix a relationship.

– If you are a fixer, you may cause your spouse or the other person to get hurt or frustrated.

– Don’t try to be a mind reader.

– Don’t filter what you hear.

– Don’t space out while they’re talking.

– Don’t advise when someone is talking.

– Don’t try to one-up the person with a story you have.

– Don’t rehearse your answer.

Key Three: How can I say something that will help and they will listen to.

– Clarify your thoughts before you speak — if you blurt, you hurt. Don’t blurt out before thinking through the best way to say it. Think before you speak.

– Don’t use “you” statements, use “I” statements.

– It’s not what you say but what people hear.

– Pause for the listeners response.

– Thank them for listening to you

– Expressing yourself when you’re upset will likely result in you say hurtful things.

Key Four: Empathic Dialogue

– Dialogue goes back and forth and involves both talking and listening.

– Empathic listening takes time but not near as long as fixing a relationship for not listening.

– Applaud, Admire and Appreciate others.

– Your relationships will only grow and improve as you grow and improve.

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team

by Patrick Lencioni

 

Most companies faults prey to five pitfalls of a team, five dysfunctions of a team.

1. Absence of Trust Functional teams trust each other.

If you don’t trust others, you cannot produce results. Teams must open up to each other. Trust lies at the core of a functional and cohesive team.

Trust says that there’s confidence between team members and that other team members have the common good in mind for the team. When team members are truly comfortable with each other, they do not walk around protecting themselves.

The team should find everyone’s weaknesses and strengths on the team. In a team meeting, have each individual take a moment to talk about his/her own strengths and weaknesses

– the exercise can be very helpful for the team. It is important to know that each individual has his/her own distinct personality and preferences – it is good to know about each person.

2. Fear of Conflict

All great relationships require conflict to grow — marriage, friendship, parenting and business. It is important to decipher interpersonal conflict & fighting from constructive conflict.

Healthy conflict is actually a timesaver. You must first acknowledge that the right kind of conflict is healthy and does not need to be avoided. A leader will make dysfunction amongst the team thrive by avoiding constructive conflict.

3. Lack of Commitment

Failure to Buy-in Decisions Commitment is a dysfunction of two things: clarity and buy-in. When people feel like they don’t get it (purpose, reason for doing something, etc.), they will not get buy-in or get on board.

People need to weigh-in before they can buy-in People know that not everyone has to agree with them, but they should be heard.

Everyone’s ideas should be heard and considered so that they will genuinely buy-in. Until each member of the team has placed their thoughts and opinions on the table can they make a wise decision that others will buy into. When a leader fails to consider buy-in from his people, frustration and dysfunction will follow.

4. Avoidance of Accountability

People will not hold each other accountable for something if they have not bought into it. Accountability is a buzzword that has lost its power.

Team members must be able to call out others on performance and commitment. Keep each other accountable on what has been agreed upon. The discomfort of telling someone something will cause many to avoid it for personal comfort.

A team must respect each other enough to keep each other accountable.

5. Inattention to Results

The tendency is usually to care about everything else except for the good of the team as a whole. We should put our own ego or priorities to the side for that of the team.

Every person must know the most important things (priorities, goals, tasks, etc.) that need to be done in order to work on them. Is it customer service, personal revenue, etc.? What is the overarching goal?

Are you making the team better or making it dysfunctional? Successful teams overcome the dysfunctions.

The Difference Maker

by John Maxwell

– A motivational speaker makes you feel good, but the next day you don’t know what to do; a motivational teacher makes you feel good but the next day you know what to do.

– Attitude is not everything, but it is the difference maker.

– Attitude is an inward feeling shown by outward behavior. People always try to mask the way they feel on the inside but attitude always wiggles it’s way out.

– There’s not a single part of your life that is not affected by your attitude and your future will be affected by your attitude as well.

– Your attitude comes from: 1

. Your attitude comes from who you are

2. Your attitude comes from your environment – how you grew up, who you’re around, etc. divorce, deaths, poverty, etc.

3. Your attitude is an expression of others, how you feel. Things that were said to you earlier in life you are reacting to them as a result.

4. Your attitude comes from your self image, how you see yourself. It’s hard to see anything in the world positive if you see yourself as negative.

5. Your attitude comes from your life experience.

6. Your attitude is affected by those you’re around, peers. You become like the people that you hang around with. You usually do not change the people that you’re around, acting like them. You become negative, bitter, complainer, etc. because that is how the people around you are.

7. Your attitude comes from your beliefs, what you think. Every thought that you have shaped your life.

8. Your attitude comes from your choices, what you do. Many people want to change life, and the things around them but the first person that needs to be changed is yourself.

– To change your life you must take responsibility for what you do with your attitude.

– Your attitude can be the difference maker, but it is not the only thing needed to be a success. If someone has good skills and an ok attitude and someone else has a great attitude but no skills, the person with more skills will get the job. A great attitude alone will not get you the job.

1. Your attitude cannot substitute for competence. If you think you could do something, that is confidence; if you know how to do something that is competence. The two are different.

2. A great attitude can help you personally, make you happy, make you more content and enjoy life, but but it cannot help your position.

3. Your attitude cannot substitute for experience.

4. Your attitude cannot substitute for personal growth. Quit waiting for the tide to come begin being the man you should be. Nothing can substitute for personal learning.

– Your attitude will not stay good automatically. Attitude will not fix everything, you must work at it.

– Attitude is the difference maker, but you cannot buy attitude.

– I cannot choose what happens to me but I can choose what happens in me.

– Some things are beyond my control, but I can choose to respond the right way.

– Gratitude to make the difference in your approach to life. Two men look through prison bars, one saw mud and the others other saw stars.

– The happiest people in life do not have everything, but they do make the best of everything. – Who we are determines how we see other people

– In life, obstacles are inevitable, so how are we going to handle them? Make the best of things. The path you choose depends on your attitude.

– Every challenge is an opportunity and every opportunity has a challenge.

– Your attitude has profound influence on how you see life and the way you live it.

– What negative thoughts consistently control your mind? You cannot change your attitude for the better until you recognize what is impacting your attitude for the worse.

– The desire to change is a key to growth in life.

– Change is possible but only if you want it bad enough.

– If you want to change your attitude, start with the change of behavior. Change your habits and you will change your attitude.

Discouragement

– If you let discouragement inside of you, it will conquer you from the inside out.

– Everyone has moments of discouragement, but the question is if you’re going to give up or get up.

– When discouragement comes there are splatters and bouncers: splatters are those that fall and splat, staying on the bottom. Bouncers are those that when they fall jump back up. Your attitude will help you determine if you’re going to be a splatter or a bouncer.

– Here are five attitudes to help you bounce back up with discouragement:

1. Get back up. You cannot solve your problems by ignoring them, but you cannot solve them by being fixated on them either. When you recognize the problem, begin focusing on the solution.

2. See the right people. Some people just lift you up, so get around the right people that will lift you up and give you hope. Everyone you come in contact with is in need of a lifter, you can lift them up and help them.

3. Say the right words. One of the big problems in discouragement is self talk, negative thinking. One of the biggest problems in life when it comes to discouragement is that we listen to ourselves instead of talk to ourselves. It’s not what happens to me or what happened that matters the most. This too shall pass.

4. Have the right expectations. Have to remain flexible and not expect for everything to go perfectly. Focus on what you can achieve not what you cannot achieve.

5. Make the right decisions. Instead of being held captive by these discouraging thoughts and times, decide to move forward. Change – It’s hard for everyone. Everyone wants to move forward, but we almost always resist change.

– Why people resist change:

1. People resist change because of what it may do to them personally.

2. People resist change because of fear of the unknown.

3. People resist change because the timing might be wrong. Find out if others are on board. Is the leadership capable of making this change? Are there other benefits involved in this change?

4. People resist change because it feels awkward. When was the last time you did something that felt awkward?

5. People resist change because of tradition. People think that just because something is a tradition that it must be right, but that is not always so.

– Without change there could be no progress.

– Make a commitment to pay the price for change.

– Things must change within you before the change without (outside of) you.

– Decide that there are some things not worth changing. What are the things that you’re willing to live and die for, the non-negotiables.

– It’s never too late to change.

Problems

– Problems are inescapable. All of us have problems. Your perspective about the problems make the difference. Problems can make you bitter or better.

– The size of the person is more important than the size of the problem.

– Problems responded to correctly can actually advance us forward.

– Anticipate problems.

• A good leader does not see problems as abnormal but as something normal that happens in life.

• A problem not anticipated is a problem; a problem anticipated is only an opportunity.

– Face the problem.

• Most people try to flee from the problem, run from it. Others try to forget the problem, just ignore it. Others try to fight the problem but it does not go away. But we must face the problem so we can find a solution.

– Evaluate the problem.

– Embrace the problem.

• Each problem is an opportunity. Problems are wake up calls for opportunity.

• Problems will cause us to use our creativity and all that we have.

– Think of people who have bigger problems. When we have a friend who loses a loved one, all of our problems seem so petty.

– List out all of the ways that can be used to solve the problem. There’s a solution to every problem whether we know it or not.

– Determine the best three ways to solve the problem. Good thinkers always have more than one way to solve a problem. It is a mistake if we think that there’s only one solution to a problem.

– Refocus on the mission and move on. When you make a mistake, don’t fight it or justify it, just admit it and refocus on the mission.

– A problem solved is a springboard for success. Fear.

– Even the first man Adam had fear when he heard God’s voice and hid from him. Fear is a part of human nature.

– Here are some negative things the fear can do in a persons life:

1. Fear breeds more fear.

Most things will not come to pass, but we live in fear that they will.

2. Fear causes inaction.

Fear is like a warning sign that makes us afraid of a dog that could not even hurt us. Fear can create a debilitating cycle. Fear makes us afraid of trying something that could help us. If we give into fear we will never know what could happen. We cannot allow fear to paralyze us. If we are too afraid of failure, we will probably never win.

3. Fear weakens us.

We could not allow fear to vaster us and our strengths. Fear makes the wolf bigger than he really is. Sometimes fear makes us afraid of things that could not even really hurt us. Fear can push in the wrong direction by causing you to do something.

4. Fear keeps us from showing our potential. One of the greatest things we can do is be afraid of what could happen to us. People who are ruled by fear play it safe and that is dangerous.

– Fear can be overcome by anyone.

Here are few steps to overcome fear:

1. Admit your fears. You cannot overcome your fears unless you admit that they exist.
2. Discover the source of your fear. Most people’s fears are based more on feeling than they are on facts.
3.  Realize how fears can limit you. Studies have shown that 95% of our fears are baseless. The truth is that life is dangerous so just decide to live it to the fullest.
4. Accept normal fear as the price of progress. Do not let fear rule you rather except it as the price for becoming better or learning more. Don’t let fear stop you from taking steps in the right direction. The sting of the bee will stop you from getting the sweet honey from the honeycomb.
5. Convert fear into fire. Everyone feels the same out of fear, but a warrior will turn that fear into fire and use it. Afraid of poverty, use it to have a strong worth ethic. Afraid of rejection, use it to learn to relate better.
6. Focus on things that you can control. Many things you cannot control in life, but focus on the things that you can. There’s a great difference between being worried and being concerned. A worried person sees the problem does nothing, a concerned person sees the problem and finds a solution.
7. Give today your attention, not yesterday or tomorrow. Most of our attention is given to what has passed or what will happen, but focus on today. Worrying about our past is a waste of time. If you have done the best that you can do, there’s no use worrying about it because nothing can change it. Do not focus just on the destination, enjoy the journey. Do all within your power to joy work here and now, you cannot change the past or the future.
8. Feed the right emotion and starve the wrong one. Fear and faith are both present in our lives but the emotion that you feed will be the one that dominates. Focus on your faith and feed it, starve your fears and do not waste time thinking about it. Do the thing that you think that you cannot. Failure.

– There are three types of people in this world, the wills, the won’ts and can’ts.

– Don’t be afraid to take a risk. Life is full of rest.

– Everyone experiences failure, but we do not have to let us keep it keep us down.

– Failure does not have to keep you down. Do not let failure make you scared of trying again.

– Change your vocabulary. 2 dangerous words in English vocabulary: ”if only”.

– You may think that the odds are stacked against you but so what, every person who has achieved anything had the odds stacked against him/her. 

– Let failure mark you to success.

– Hold onto your sense of humor. Don’t take your mistakes too seriously, it is not a matter of life or death.

– Learn from your mistakes. You can learn more from your failures than your successes. Sometimes you win sometimes you learn, that’s the mark of a good attitude.

– Don’t lose your perspective. Failure is like success, it’s a day-to-day process. It is how you deal with life along the way, it is not a one-time event.

– Don’t become too familiar with failure.

– Make failure a gauge for growth.

– Never give up. If you give up, you will never know how close you were to success. Get back up. If you have experienced failure, you’re in a better position to succeed than those who have not failed. So if you feel a lot, celebrate because as long as you do not give up you’re in a good place.

– Never forget the power of choice, you are the person who decides your attitude.

– Everyone has a good attitude when things are going well, but you must decide to have a good attitude at every stage of life.

The Motivation Manifesto

By Brendon Burchard

 

– It is not possible to live in the past, future, or some other place and expect to be happy; we consciously must live right now.

– Without self-mastery of fear and doubt in our every day life, we will be defeated.

– Hurry has become our mastery. We have lost focus, we must slow it all down. Most people don’t remember the last time they were were joyous or happy.

– We must not let social pressures ruin our potential.

– Only two things can change our lives: something new happens from without us or something new happens within us.

Freedom:

– Everyone wants to have freedom

– personal freedom, financial freedom, religious freedom, emotional freedom, time, etc. We were not made to be a oppression.

– We must break away from self oppression and social pressures if we are going to be free in our lives

– The greatest depression comes from our own selves

– we are our greatest suppressors, not that which is around us.

– It should be clear to us that we can be our own worst enemies.

– Personal power comes from personal responsibility.

– We must be both conscious and responsible for our actions and behaviors if we truly want to have freedom.

– Personal freedom is not just being free from pain and oppression, it is also being free to live life at its fullest.

Fear:

– Fear is nothing more than bad management of your mind.

– People try to tell us that fear will give us courage or that it is natural, but fear is actually a thief to humanity.

– Fear was put in us to avoid death and threat of physical safety, but we have perverted it and used it the wrong way.

– Fear rules us if we let it. We can choose to avoid it or accept it.

– If fear is ruling in our lives it is because we let it instead of choosing boldness, victory or greatness.

– So if we are not free, it is because we have chosen to let fear rule in our lives. Fear wins or freedom wins.

– There is no genetic fact or reason that one has to fear more than another. Fear is only because we have poor mental faculties or bad influences that have taught us to be fearful.

– Fearful people usually have developed that way because of past experiences — parents, or situations in life that have caused them to be timid or afraid. So fear has become their guided default.

– People will drive us to fear — parents, friends, etc. Not that they purposely want to hurt us, but they’re “warning” or “looking out for us”… and this will cause us to fear.

– How often do we let the worry burn us because we do not consciously put out the fire. Just as if we would have an extinguisher in our hand yet not use it when our house is burning, so it is what we were he consciously do nothing about it.

– We have the tools to overcome worry; they lie within us.

– Just as a lion tamer was once afraid to walk into the pin but overcame it, so we can overcome our fears so that they no longer stop us.

– We must have a motive for action. The greatest motive for action his choice. Happiness, sadness, and anger is a choice.

– Although there are people who need medical help, the vast majority do not need drugs, they need a desire. They do not need medication, they need a different life approach.

– People that are motivated are not lucky, they have chosen their path.

– Motivation is not just a feeling, it is a conscientious choice.

– You must sustain motivation. Just as it is not enough for the athlete to dream about being an athlete every once a while, he must schedule times to exercise and listen to his coach. And so we must give attention and effort to our motivation.

– If we are to grow our motivation, the two elements we need are attitude and environment. We ourselves must have a positive attitude and place ourselves around those and those that can help us. Have a place where you can think, be comfortable and be inspired.

– The birth and death of each day’s motivation lies with you.

– No person that lives in the yesterday truly has the power to live today.

– We must be the guardian of our mind – be careful for those commercials that tell us that we cannot live without their products, etc. We must stand firmly at the post of our mind. Reclaim our agenda.

– We seldom go without a day of meaninglessly swiping and checking all of our digital devices.

– Is what we are daily doing have meaning or just filling our time? Busyness does not mean it is meaningful.

– Write down what you want to accomplish this week, this month and this year – they become our declaration of what we want to accomplish with our time and our lives. Without such a written declaration, we will very likely walk around aimlessly. There’s a reason that nations have written declarations and follow them.

– For most, not knowing how to say no is where their life falls into the thicket of distress. You do not have to say yes to everything that comes across your desk.

– People will not always be happy by us saying no, but after while it will be clear that we have a purpose and that we are not deviating from. The goal of saying no is not to be cruel or cold rather to keep our sanity, purpose and progress.

– Every day we can do something to advance our goals and purpose.

– Doubt produces only small men and small women, scared of their own shadows. Only faith can get us out of doubt’s grips. Think why we can’t overcome, there’s no reason to doubt.

– Delay is another monstrous head that tries to creep up in our lives. Delay cries out and tells us to stop, wait, we are not ready yet, and listen to my (delay) brother doubt. Because of delay, many people live in misery or regret. Decisive action is what kills the voice of the delay. Destiny changes when we take action and do not delay. Heroism is to take action even when we are afraid.

– Defiance is yet another poison.

– Division is another poison that destroys many people. We feel like everyone around us is an idiot or doesn’t deserve our respect. Loneliness, fear or anger towards others just division. When we do not value another person’s rights. The answer to our division is love. Love sees the value of others, it realizes that everyone has their battles I deserve respect. Advancement.

– All we need to move forward already lies within us.

– What great thing has ever been accomplished without a little recklessness. It is reckless to try something new or against convention.

– The bold know that in order to do something they must begin.

– You are responsible for your reality.

– Decide what you want to happen in your world and think of how to make it happen.

– No goals equals no growth.

– Action is a must to making things happen. The timid and afraid will always find some reason to start.

– We are joyful only when we do what we think brings joy. We are successful only when we do what brings success. We’re satisfied only what we do what satisfies us.

– Relaxing is an action, dreaming, meditating, it’s so much more than an action.

– Those who do not advance in life are often immature and reliable on others.

– We must not be trapped by fear of criticism or abandonment, we must press forward and advance.

– The only permission granted by society is to follow its norms and rules. No one wants us to advance too quickly because they are afraid they will be left behind.

– Will we choose other people’s approvals and opinions over our own desires and advances? We cannot give everything away because we let other people rule us.

– Most of the success stories in life are people started from scratch, that had nothing but started anyway.

– It is but our own will, desire and vision that we need to start, nothing else. There could be no mastery in life if we cannot turn our disappointment and misfortune to joy and appreciation. If we are not joyful enough, the truth is that we are not bidding will towards joy.

We could lie and say that joyful people have it easier than us, but that is not true. We all know people who are less fortunate get our happy.

Children are little sprouts of joy, do not worry or concern themselves with so many things. So let us become thankful for all that we have and let joy return to us.

Just as joy is a choice, so his gratitude. The person others can count on. Say you’re going to be somewhere, be there. Do what you say you’re going to do.

Desperation causes many people to lose their integrity. Slow down and enjoy what we have. We must stop being like hienas wolfing down all of our food take time to taste. Let us take pleasure what we are, if it does not push aside. It is such a easy formula.

Ziglar on Selling

by Zig Ziglar

 

– Learn, look and live: Learn from the past, Look with hope to the future and Live in the presents.

– Realize that all salesmen have had the door slammed in their face, talked rudely to and laughed that. – Keep up with fresh information to stay ahead of your competitors.

– Choosing to be a good salesman is a daily task. Make a daily commitment that you will become a better salesman.

– Your salary will become more effective when you become more effective.

– In sales, you don’t have to wait for things to happen, you can make things happen.

– In sales, it’s an inside job; depends on you. Depends on your attitude, determination, planning and commitment to make things happen instead of waiting on someone else to make things happen.

– Professional sales people learn to put themselves in the shoes of other people. – Professional sales people must be excellent managers – they must manage their time and their life. The better they manage, the better they will do as a sales person.

– Understand that you can finish school but you will never finish your education, that is a lifelong process.

– The salesperson that will not keep up with the changes of the time will not be as effective as he could be.

– Happiness is not pleasure, it is victory.

– You can have everything in life that you want if you want help everyone in life get what they want.

– Being a salesman is not an 8 to 5 job, it is constantly looking for opportunities to work in any atmosphere.

– COD:  C – Commitment. Learn to communicate correctly your commitment. You don’t have to be pushy, you can do it in a tactful away. O – Observation. Observing at all times what is going on around you. D – Dedication. Dedicated to getting those contacts and having prospects.

– You will make more sales when you have the customers best interest in mind. The people get what they want and they will help you get what you want.

– If you’re going to make a sales call, know the reason for your call and stick with it – if you’re unsure, the person on the end of the line will be unsure as well.

– When you make calls, dress for success. The way you dress even if you’re making the call from home, will affect how you feel and how you make the call.

– Smile when you talk on the phone, your facial expressions will come out in your voice.

1. Need Analysis. Analyze the need of the customer. If you give people both a reason for buying and an excuse for buying, you will very likely make the sale. People buy more because they want to rather than because they need too. So show people how what you’re selling and how it would be good and advantageous for them. Ask questions and you’ll find out what they need and want and then you’ll know how to help them.

2. Need Awareness. Find out what the customer needs and wants.

3. Need Solution. Present them with the solution for their problem and their situation. You don’t just buy a computer, you buy something that will help you organize your life. You don’t buy a bed, you’re purchasing something that gets you a good night sleep. You don’t buy an exercise machine, you are purchasing something that will give you a longer and happier life. In the same way, show them that what they are buying from you will solve problems and meet needs. We don’t buy products, we buy solutions. We lead with need.

4. Need Satisfaction. Have their best in mind. Identify the problem, give the solution and satisfy the customer.

People buy more when they are more emotionally involved. Ask three questions when you finish presenting your product.

A. Can you see how our product can save you money?

B. Are you interested in saving money? (this question seems obvious, but should be asked.)

C. If you are ever going to start saving money, what is the best time to start? (this is a reminder that failure to take action will have consequences.)

– They say that 96% of salesman quit trying after their 4th try but it is said that someone does not buy a product until after the 5th time. Be consistent.

– When your prospect says NO, it may just mean that he does not KNOW enough or you have not explained it well enough.

– When a prospect responds negatively, get QUIET: Q – begin with a question U – understand yourself what their objection is I – identify the objection E – empathize with the prospect T – since you are empathizing instead of sympathizing with the prospect, now you are ready to test the objection.

– When you’re responded to in a rude manner, you have a choice to make — you can choose to respond ugly or choose to be kind. You have the power of choice.

– No matter how angry or upset someone is, remember that it is hard to continue speaking in anger for more than 2 minutes. If you will just let the person finish than his anger will be over, but if you interrupt him you will allow him to regain momentum and keep going.

– Many times, when a customer is upset, it has something to do with what happened to them prior and not necessarily what you are talking about. If you can keep your calm, they will very likely come back to you and feel sorry for the attitude that they had.

– When you are traveling work hard, but when you’re at home be home. Don’t go home to your family but your mind still be traveling.

– One dissatisfied customer will tell more people about you than one satisfied customer will tell. You must be very aware and careful with customers.

– If you will treat prospects as you do you’re paying customers, you will avoid 99% of your problems.

– Most sales people don’t fail because they work too hard, they fail because they are not working hard enough.

– It cost almost 5 times as much work getting a new customer as it does keeping a current customer – so work at making those that you already have happy.

– What a sales person works at organization and discipline, he will be more successful in every area of life.

– Until you get yourself right, your sales and business will not be right – make sure you work on your own attitude.

– Failure is an event, not a person. So if you have failed, leave it in the past and decide to move forward.

– Turn your car into an automobile University. If you spend so many hours in a car, use it to your advantage and educate yourself.

– Take care of your health. Just because you travel does not mean that you have to eat bad and not exercise. In some ways, it is easier to choose what you eat because you don’t have to be tempted to run to the refrigerator.

– Exercise. When you arrive somewhere you can make a schedule to walk, jog, run or exercise in someway. It could be easier making a schedule to exercise while you’re away than it is what you at home.

– Success is not beating the other guy, it is using the abilities you have to the fullest.

The Three Signs of a Miserable Job

by Patrick Lencioni

 

• People spend 8 hours every weekday at work and many people hate their job… what a miserable way to live!

• Eliminating dissatisfactory at work is accomplished by finding the right job.

• The key to a happy job is finding something that you like to do that pays the bills.

• Being miserable affects your spouse, your children, your friends and your life. It leads to substance abuse, depression and violence at home.

• If you enjoy your job, it will make your time working much more pleasurable.

• A job is bound to be miserable unless you have some way to measure it. If a football player plays without knowing what the score is, he gets frustrated. The same goes for a job, it only leads to frustration and being miserable if you do not know how it is going. The best teachers want a test to see how the kids are doing.. and so we must have some measure how we are doing at our job.

• Everyone needs to know that what they’re doing is making a difference in someone else’s life.

• Sports players, managers, CEOs, actors and everyone else will be miserable at their job if they do not feel like they are making a difference in someone else’s life.

• A miserable job really depends on the person – beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

• But still, there are miserable jobs; what is it that make you go home feeling zapped, that you don’t like, that sucks the energy out of you, that makes you go home frustrated or cynical?

• But being miserable doesn’t have everything to do with the job. There are sports players that are answerable doing what they do. There are billionaires who own businesses yet hate what they do.

There are three signs that make a job miserable:

• Anonymity – people need to know that what they do is important, it makes a difference.

1 The Three Signs of a Miserable Job Book Summary by Jeffrey Bush

• • Irrelevance – is what you do help someone else? You have to make the connection of what you do helping others.

• • Immeasurability – people must be able to measure how their job is going. Everyone wants to feel like they’re doing a good job, but if they are not getting feedback that they become frustrated. Even though we know this, most managers do not give good feedback to their employees.

• People that work there jobs having more fulfillment will do their job more effectively. They will arrive earlier, stay later work harder because their job brings fulfillment.

• A manager should take genuine interest in his employees lives. People want to be managed as people, not as mere workers.

• Human beings need to be needed. Everyone wants to feel that they are needed making a difference.

• Managers often forget that workers have their own sense of what to feel satisfied and their job. Worker is not just want to do whatever the manager wants, he also as a person that wants to feel like what he does matters and makes a difference.

• Great athletes don’t try to make a goal or score a touchdown just because it would look better on their contract, they do it because it gives them a sense of fulfillment. Every person must in someway measure their fulfillment.

The Best Advice I Ever Got on Marriage

by Jim Daily

 

This is a compilation of different author’s opinions on marriage. It was put together by Focus on the Family.

An open heart is of big importance for a good marriage.

The heart of spouse must be open and will only open up when spouse feels safe.

True intimacy is open hearts.

Recognize your spouse’s value.

Write down a list of the reasons why you value your spouse, and then express it to your spouse. Write a list of “I love you because…”

A successful marriage requires you to fall in love with the same person over and over again.

• Keep your Commitment to your Commitment — Ken Blanchard Years from now you should love your spouse more than you do now. Remember your commitment.

Do you want your relationship to work? It’s a commitment if so. Marriage works when you have two “yes’” to that commitment.

You should be able to write down “What I love about you is…” and “Why I choose to spend the rest of my life with you is…”

• Make Love a Verb — Andy Stanley

Falling in love is easy but staying in love is hard.

When the going gets tough many just go.

We treat love like a noun, something that happened, not is happening. Love is

not a one time thing.

It takes a plan.

Falling in love requires only a heart beat but staying in love requires a commitment.

We know how to fall in love but most do not know how to stay in love.

Key to staying in love is respect, respect, respect.

We are to guard our hearts (Prov. 4:23)

Think before you speak.

Pay close attention to your heart.

We have fairy tale beliefs about marriage.

Believe the best, don’t think the worse.

Nothing speaks more of our Christian life like our marriage

3. My Heavenly Father-in-law — Gary Thomas

Your wife isn’t just your wife, she is God’s daughter.

Your marriage isn’t just about you, it’s about God. You can’t treat a girl wrong and

expect a father to be good with that.

I Peter 3:7

If someone was treating your kids bad, you wouldn’t be happy taking to that person.

God wants His children to be loved

We love because He first loved us.

Is how you treated your spouse last week the way you would want someone to treat your child?

4. Practice non-random Acts of Kindness — Paul & Teri Reisser

All of us are selfish creatures by nature and rather to be served than serve. Do small things to show love, whether making bed, changing toilet paper roll, making the coffee, etc.

be intentional about serving your spouse.

5. Lighten up and Laugh — Ted Cunningham

Laughter is a beautiful thing. You can’t stay mad at someone who makes you laugh and you can’t hate someone with whom you laugh. God wants you to enjoy marriage.

Life is a grime. Age, money or nothing else will get us out of the grime. Death is the only thing that ends the grime. But in the midst of the grime, we are to enjoy life. We can’t get out of the grime but we can choose joy during life.

Your wife was not put in your life to make life miserable, it can be enjoyable.

Proverbs 17:22. Go and enjoy life with your spouse.

6. Be your Partner’s Best Friend — Les & Leslie Parrot

It’s not a lack of love but a lack of friendship that kills a marriage.

70% of happiness in marriage could be attributed to friendship in marriage.

Friends choose to serve each other.

Study what makes your spouse laugh.

Add more laughter to your relationship.

Good friends protect each other. We all have bad moments but good friends have the other’s back.

We shouldn’t take for granted the friendship of our spouse.

• Communicate how much your Spouse Means to You — H.B. London Never go to bed mad at each other.

Deal with your issues as they happen or they’ll only get worse. Never assume

Most don’t know how to say what needs to be said.

We fail to express our love & we take each other for granted. Never, never stop listening

Affairs occur when a spouse doesn’t fulfill the needs of the other. Don’t avoid the real issues.

Hostility and criticism can kill your spouse’s love. Don’t make the other feel cheap or useless. Don’t give up

It takes a lifetime of commitment. Pray for your spouse.

Love that communicates is love that doesn’t fail.

• Stop, Drop and Roll — Dewey Wilson

What people see on the outside is not always what is on the inside.

Your marriage didn’t go south over night, but you can still turn it around.

Before change occurs, it must make sense.

• Stop — when you think of old thoughts or something that will only cause problems, stop! 2 Cor. 10:4 — we have power to stop those thoughts.
• Drop — to your knees in prayer asking God to help.

• Roll — change the negative thoughts, words or actions into positive ones.

Become a student of your spouse.

Your attitude will determine your response.

God wants to do a work in you so let him.

9. The Art of Affirmation — Joni Eareckson Tada

The Bible teaches that the tongue has incredible power. With your tongue, you can pull down or be the best cheerleader.

Commend your spouse when you see the good in them.

Practice affirmation. Those words are to your spouse what water is to your flowerbeds.

Write a note of encouragement or say something but your words can change the countenance and heart of your spouse.

• Ask Older Couples what Works for Them — Bill & Pam Farrel Get real advice by real people.

Conflict is normal for couples. Forgive quickly.

Three is better than two, Jesus can make you have a great marriage. Seek out marriage by older and experienced, good people.

• Nine Words that have Helped us Stay Married — Bob Waliszewski Determine there are certain things that you won’t say in marriage — divorce Failed expectations — life is not only about you

Differing view points — about little silly things

The marital reset button — walk or take time to breathe but don’t leave each other.

What works for us — decide that you will not You’re not always right.

Don’t keep score

Avoid the silent treatment

Stay away from words like “always” and “never”

Don’t threaten your spouse with divorce or separation.

• Grow as a Couple and as Individuals — Frank Pastore

The measure of a man’s ministry is his marriage.

God doesn’t call you to be a single servant rather to work together as a couple. You need friends that can help enrich your life and marriage. We need couples that we can learn from and fellowship with.

13. Putting Sex on the Calendar — Jill Savage

Plan and calendar sex and write it down in code. Doesn’t always have to be spontaneous.

It eliminates the asking or begging for sex.

It increases desire. The brain is the largest sexual component.

It increases anticipation. We can plan time together.

It allows for planning.

It helps couples prepare both mentally and physically.

It helps build trust.

While sex is good spontaneously, putting it on the calendar works as well.

4 The Best Advice I Ever Got on Marriage Book Review by Jeffrey Bush

14. Attitude is a Choice — Stormie Omartian

The Holy Spirit doesn’t make us have fruit, we have to choose to have fruit.

We choose our attitude.

You can decide not to be bitter, not get upset, etc.

15. Deliberately Seek the Lord – Phil & Heather Joel

Is the form of Christianity we live what it should be?

Decide to read the Bible and get close to the Lord. As you get close to the Lord,

you can and will grow in marriage.

Prayer changes everything.

Oneness in marriage with God is a decision and one that will change you and your marriage. It is the key.

As a man’s relationship is with God, so will the marriage be.

16. Believe your Spouse wants your Best – Jeff & Shaunti Feldhahn

When you grasp that your spouse wants the best for you will change your

marriage. If you think your spouse wants to hurt you, you will have a bad

marriage.

Believing spouse wants the best for you will not only solve many problems but will also avoid many problems.

What do you assume about your spouse?

Replace your thoughts with positive ones. What can be a positive reason that you’re spouse did what he/she did? Take your thoughts captive. Decide and assume that your spouse wants the best for you. Learn the truth about your spouse.

Let your understanding change your marriage.

• The Power of Taking a Time-Out – Michael & Amy Smalley Learn to react instead of respond.

Reacting is launching out immediately upon our emotions; responding is thinking before you take action.

James 1:19-20

Taking a timeout is not just for kids. When you get upset, you should take a time out. Avoiding something is just walking away from it, but taking a timeout is getting away from each other to think through it and then return back later to discuss it.

When you get alone and pray about it, the Holy Spirit may reveal to you that your attitude or actions are not pleasing to Him.

• The Convicting Question that Changed our Marriage – Lee Strobel Ask yourself the question, how would you like to be married to you? Willpower does not change a man and time does not change man, only Christ changes men.

Matthew 7:1 – Look at your own faults instead of judging your spouse. Do not be conflict avoiders, become conflict facers.

Learn to listen – James 1:19