Category: Book Reviews

The Coaching Habit

by Michael Stanier

 

– Coaching should be a daily, informal event not a rare, formal event that is announced.

– Coaching lies within building and helping others.

– Theory is no good if you do not know how to put it into practice.

– Ask just one question and then keep quiet and listen so they can respond.

– Small talk might be a way to start up, but it rarely leads to a good conversation piece.

– Be careful not to coach for performance but for development.

– If you know what questions to ask, get straight to the point.

– Instead of warming up or waiting around hoping to get to the point, just ask the question and then shut up and listen to what the person has to say.

– Tell less and ask more.

– Ask one more time. We tend to not ask enough, so for clarity sake, make sure to ask one more time.

– Learn to say “and what else”.

– Do not ask a rhetorical question, ask a real question.

– Begin with “what’s on your mind?”

– The reasonable man adapts himself to the world, the unreasonable man tries to adapt the world to himself. Therefore it is the unreasonable man that makes the progress.

– Commit more slowly by not saying yes or no so quickly. Listen and ask questions.

– When you have to say no, make sure it is clear that you’re saying no to the task and not note to the person.

– There are book ends to a good conversation when coaching someone: “what’s on your mind” to start and “what was most helpful to you” to finish.

– Add more curiosity. A little less advice and a lot more of curiosity will get you further.

The Art of the Deal

by Donald Trump

 

– Some of the best deals are the ones you do not make.

– Always listen to your gut feeling and not just what looks good on paper.

– You need to be able to act promptly.

– He has his food ordered in and sent to his office because going out to eat is a waste of time in his opinion.

– He does not like parties but will go if he needs to for business purposes.

– Aim high and keep pushing, pushing, pushing to get what you are aiming for.

– A lot of dealmaking is not about intelligence but about instincts.

– Think big. If you have to think anyways, you might as well think big. Most people think small.

– Don’t take too seriously your critics.

– Leverage is having something the other guy needs or wants – always deal with leverage.

– Deliver the goods. You can create excitement and get away with things for a while, but eventually people will figure it out and you cannot con them forever… You must deliver the goods.

– Contain the cost – spend what you have to but don’t spend what you don’t have to.

– When all of his friends in college were reading comics, he was reading books on politics and other important issues.

– Anything cleaned up and maintained is worth more money – if you wax and polish your car, you could probably get $400 more out of it; and the same goes with real estate and everything else.

– It does not stay up at night worrying about many things, it is mainly an optimist.

– Be direct, simple and enthusiastic.

– A good-looking presentation goes a long way.

– Quality attracts more quality.

– Credibility is crucial.

– Hire the best people and give them a salary they deserve and you will have a topclass organization.

– There are times when you must be aggressive and other times we must be willing to just lay back and be calm.

– Great management pays off.

– A good view is worth a small fortune.

– In any partnership, you are only as strong as your weakest link.

– Leadership is the key to getting the job done.

– You are not measured by how much you undertake, but how much you accomplish.

– Learn to overcome obstacles and motivate others to do their work.

The Art of Storytelling

by Jeff Davidson

 

– Storytelling is something that has been done in every culture throughout history.

– Storytelling is essentially using props or anything to get your point across when sharing something.

– But good storytelling is not merely using a prop as it is involving their own lives into that of the listeners.

– Good storytellers formulate images in the mind of their listeners so they can imagine and be with them in the story in order that the listeners can share the experience with the speaker.

– It is important to understand that the audience speaks to the storyteller just as much as the storyteller speaks to the audience. With their movements, their eyes, sitting up or different cues with their body that communicate with the storyteller.

– Good storytellers are not just giving a performance to the audience as much as they are involving the audience.

– The storyteller must not get so wrapped up in his story that he loses the audience and does not take them along with him. If he does not make eye contact, the right amount of pauses, etc., the audience will drift off.

– If you understand the motivation of why you are sharing the story more than just the fact that you’re sharing the story, it will greatly help you get your story across to the people.

– If a picture is worth 1,000 words, then a story is worth many thousands if not millions.

The 7 Habits Signature Series

Habit 1 Be Proactive

by Stephen Covey

 

– To know and not to do is really not to know.

– The results we get in life depends on what we do.

– Habits are powerful and they determine our level of effectiveness or ineffectiveness.

– We must be proactive, then begin with the end goal in mind, and then we must put first things first.

– If you want significant breakthroughs, you must change your paradigm, how you see things. If you change how you see things, you would change how you feel and act.

– It’s not what people do to us that hurts us, it is our chosen response that hurts us.

– Learn to be happy with what you have, not with what you will have.

– The normal paradigm is to think that everything around us must change before we change, but the proactive paradigm is to say I must change and then everything around me will change.

– When we blame situations and people’s for our problems, we are not being responsible – “response-able”. We must take responsibility in order to change things.

– If you want to improve any situation, you must improve the one thing that you have control of, yourself.

– Happiness like unhappiness is a proactive choice.

– If you start thinking that the problem is out there, you must stop yourself because your thought is the problem.

– We are responsible for our own effectiveness and happiness.

– Knowing that we are responsible (response-able) is key to our effectiveness.

The 4–Hour Work Week

by Timothy Ferriss

 

– Once you decide you’re settling for second-best in life, that is what you will get.

– Do not try to please everybody.

– There’s a big difference when work is more effective and more fun.

– The perfect timing is almost never right, so don’t wait around for it.

– Emphasize your strengths instead of always trying to improve your weaknesses.

– Money alone is not the solution. Many times laziness is the problem, not a lack of money.

– Don’t avoid criticism, avoid destructive criticism.

– Action doesn’t always bring happiness but there is no happiness without action.

– Conquering fear = defining fear

– Things do not improve on their own

– Luxury has very little to do with money

– The fear we dread the most is usually the exact thing we need to do.

– Your inaction will cost you more than you can imagine. Measure the cost of inaction.

– It’s as easy as believing it can be done.

– If you are insecure, guess what… the rest of the world is too.

– Boredom is the enemy, not failure.

– You become better by failing better.

– Success can be measured in the amount of awkward conversations and situations you’re willing to put yourself in.

– Deal with rejection by persisting.

– Being busy is often an excuse for not doing the few important things you are supposed to do.

– Effectiveness is doing the things that get you closer to your goals. Efficiency is performing the task in the most economical manner possible.

– What you do is more important than how you do it.

– Working 9-5 is not the goal, it’s just the structure most people have used.

– Being busy can be a form of laziness.

– The lack of time is actually a lack of priority.

– If you had a heart attach and could only work 2 hours a day, what would you do?

– Decreasing the amount of work is not the goal, the goal is living fuller. Just having more idle time on your hands will make you go crazy, you have to live fuller.

– Retirees get depressed because of social oppression… and so will you if you do not live life fuller.

– You have to find something to focus on. You become stressed or board would you do not have something you can focus on.

– If you cannot define something or act upon it, forget it, there’s no need to worry about it.

– If you don’t make mistakes, than you’re not working on hard enough problems.

– Time without attention is useless.

– What is the big thing that has been on your list that you have not been able to get to? Stop and do that first thing in the morning.

– Adversity does not change you, it reveals who you are. Money does the same thing.

– You are never as good as they say you are and you are never as bad as they say you are.

– No statues are raised to critics.

– A good thing to remember when you were having a meltdown: are you having a breakdown or a breakthrough?

– It is usually better to keep all the resolutions instead of making new ones.

– If you will go 21 days without complaining, it is almost like it resets your brain.

– A not-to-do list is almost more effective than a to-do list. (For example: Do not check email constantly. Do not check email thread before you go to bed or right when you get up. Do not ramble with people and get to the point. Etc.) Remember that what you do not do will determine what you do, so make a list of things to not do.

– Learn to prioritize; you cannot do everything or please everyone.

– Never make the first offer when negotiating, let the other person give a price.

– Identify what excites you and what bores you.

TED Talks Storytelling

by Akash Karia

 

– The magic ingredient to making a TED talk is storytelling. Stories allow you to get your idea across to people without appearing you are lecturing them.

– The opening of the speech is super important. If you do not grab your listeners attention in the first 30 seconds of your speech, they will tune out. Open your speech with a story. Introductory remarks such as “hello, my name is, I’m glad to be here”, etc., are boring. Dive straight into a story – that is one of the greatest techniques of getting people hooked into your message.

– Stories take people on the mental journey. Stories are hardwired in our brain. Any audience cannot resist a well told story even if they try.

– A story without a conflict is not a good story. The conflict will make you think or wonder what is about to happen, put you on the edge of your chair and get you guessing at where the story is going. If there is no suspense, if everyone knows where you are going with the story, it is not a good story. When you arouse your audience’s emotions, they will have no choice but to be totally hooked in your story.

– Use personal stories. Do not just tell a story that you have heard, share a story of a personal experience that happened to you. If it is something that really happened to you, you will not have to practice or fake certain gestures, because they will be natural to you since it is your story.

– Engaging an audience is more than just giving information, it is creating a mental image in their mind. People remember how you looked and how you said it and they will likely be changed by it. Sharing a story is much more than simply telling, it is showing. Sharing information with your audience creates a mental picture of how the characters in your story look.

– There are five senses that we use to connect with the world. By using more senses in your story, it is more memorable. Use the five senses and your speech:

V – visual. They visualize what you are saying. Are you giving details so they can see it?

A – auditory. What you can hear.

K – kinesthetic. Positions and movements. Physically or emotionally.

O – olfactory. Sense of smell… make them feel they can smell it by how descriptive you are.

G – gustatory. What can they taste from your speech. As a result of using the senses, your speech will be remembered and embedded in the minds of your listeners.

 

– In order to turn your speech into a movie for your listeners, provide as many details as possible. Give specific details. Non-specific details will not paint a picture in peoples minds.

– The spark. The spark is the point in the message that gives hope, where the story changes and inspires. The spark is what caused the person to change and be inspired to do whatever he/she did.

– There should be characters in your story.

– There should be a conflict in your story.

– There should be a change in the story.

– There should be a Takeaway for the listeners. What is the point of your story? What do you want the people to remember? Make the key of your story into a short memorable or catchy phrase.

– No conflict = no curiosity = no interest.

– Leave your audience with and on an emotional high, on a high point of the story.

Stopping Stress Before it Stops You

by Kevin Leman

 

Disclaimer: this book is written for mothers but I have enjoyed several of the author’s books so I thought I would check it out and see what is applicable for everyone. Since it seems many people get stressed, I thought there could be some principles applicable for everyone. So here it is…

 

– You can minimize stress and use it as a positive tool in your life.

– Stressing out is a preventable disease.

– Stress comes from pressure. Life is a pressure cooker of stress.

– When an accident (or close-to-accident) or situation occurs, our adrenaline is pumped up and then goes back down. When we are stressed, the same occurs. If we stay stressed, the adrenaline continues and that continual adrenaline can cause ulcers, cancer and more.

– Why is it that a society like ours that has almost everything is so stressed? Much is because we do not want to wait and we want everything now.

– It is your perception of something that turns it into stress. Your job as well as anything else is not your point of stress, it is your perception of the situation that is your stress.

– Why is it that some people get stressed over a job, their boss or other situations while other people do not get stressed – it is their perception that makes them stressed.

– If you like to control, you will very likely be stressed more.

1. Children can be one of the biggest points of stress.

– Babies cry, fuss and don’t sleep. Then they turned into two-year-olds and climb around and get into everything… and the cycle only continues.

– If you let your children be in front of your marriage, they will run your life. You need to make sure that they are not first place in your life.

– All children are natural getters

– You need to let your children stay with someone else and not think you always have to be with them or right beside them.

– If your child throws a temper tantrum, don’t run to him/her, just walk out or away from them to let them realize you’re not going to run to the rescue.

– Unattainable goals of trying to be the perfect parent will only make you more frustrated and stressed.

2. Lack of Time is another point of stress.

– Take smaller bites out of life.

– Sometimes you have to say no.

3. Marriage is another point of stress.

– Make your wife part of your decisions, that shows you value her.

4. Another big source of stress is money.

– We never have enough and we always want more than we have.

– It seems that the easy answer to stress is to just take some pills but that they will likely never solve the root problem.

– A simple secret to cutting out stress is work on your priorities. You have the potential to arrange things in a way that can cut out the stress. Seems simple, and everyone knows this, but if you want to get out of stress work on your priorities.

– It is hard to get people off of their proverbial stress treadmills, they just continue forward to exhaustion and burnt out. You must change something and do something different to cut the stress out.

– Quit worrying about stuff and just face it.

– Most of what we worry about does not even happen.

– Do the unpleasant things first and get them over with and then reward yourself by dealing with the smaller things.

– Adopt the motto that if money will fix it, then it’s really not a problem. If you can fix the situation by buying another compressor, fixing a part, etc., than it is a manageable problem.

– Stress may get you down momentarily, but you do not have to let it keep you there.

– Our body can only take so much. When we put our body under too much stress, something has to give and something will give.

– You need your own game plan, a way to unplug and de-stress.

– One of the best answers to dealing with stress is being in tune with your Maker.

– Get enough rest – that is not just sleep, it is relaxing or doing something that will allow you to get away from routine (walking, sitting down, jogging, etc.).

– Develop a hobby.

– Have a group of friends.

– Recognize the things that cause stress in your life and when your body says it is too much, than back off.

– Avoid packing your day so full that you don’t have time to think.

– Share your feelings – whether to a person, on paper (journal) or in prayer, share your feelings with someone.

– Watch only a certain amount of news or certain talkshows and programs. You can only taken so much negative news, so be careful.

– Build stress relievers in your workday. Take a walk at lunch hour, drink a cup of coffee, try not to take your work home, and learn to wind down before you go home or when you are with family. Control your job or your job will control you.

Start

by Jon Acuff

 

– Instead of waiting until you are asked to do something or that a certain time comes, just go ahead and start now.

– People that we think are geniuses were not able to make any shortcuts, they just started learning at a earlier age.

– Stand on the shoulders of giants.

– Work harder and smarter.

– Luck is a word that lazy people use to describe someone who has worked hard to make it to where they are at.

– Your practice will determine how you play in the game.

– Don’t climb the entitlement letter – if you have to tell people do you know who I am, you yourself have already forgotten.

– Both doubt and fear are like muscles, if you keep using them they will only get stronger.

– You must kill doubt and fear or they will kill you.

– Be lead, be taught, be a learner.

– Learning from others is something that will catapult you to the next level.

– Volunteer and take every opportunity you get to do what you enjoy.

– You’ll never become good if you do not practice and persist.

– Do not spend more time promoting what you do than practicing what you do. Promoting will make others think that you are a master, practicing will make you a master.