52 Things Kids Need from a Dad
by Jay Payleitner
– If you spend time with your kids now, they will spend time with you later.
– Proverbs 17:6
– Children are born with the deficit that only father can fill.
– Kids need their dads to beat the odds (drug use, sex, confusion, lying, etc.), all of which can be reduced if dads are doing their jobs at home.
– A father’s absence in the home is connected with so many negative things (future and present)… So a father’s presence at home can avoid much bad.
– Kids need their dads to stop and make memories.
– Never miss an opportunity to make a memory.
– A man’s memory is powerful, so stop make memories.
– A kid should know that there’s always a hug waiting for him/her.
– Tuck in your kids every night.
– Practice persistent parenting; be there for your children every day.
– Teach your children to be optimist instead of pessimist; to make lemonade with the lemons. Use setbacks in life to teach your children how to have a good attitude and get through it instead of get mad at it.
– Your kids are always watching, so look for a way to turn the negative into a positive.
– Start a file folder for each one of your children – keeping notes, drawings and other things for each one of them. We cannot remember everything, but if we keep a file on items from our children, they make for good memories later on down the road.
– Take time to stand over the bed and pray for them while they are sleeping. There is power in the prayers of a father.
– We must be right with God in order to be most effective with our children.
– Don’t lie to your kids just to make your own life easier. Hypocrisy and lies build up walls but truth and honesty tear down walls.
– If something is important to your kids, make it important to you.
– Know where your kids are, who their best friends are and what’s going on in their lives. Both social media, what they read and in every day life.
– Answer their questions with a question to teach them and make them think. They need to learn to think, so teach them. Make questions into conversations.
– Make family traditions — for Christmas, easter, summer, etc.
– A home is to be lived in so don’t go crazy over something getting broke, getting dirty, messing up the grass, etc… most important thing is your kids, not the material things.
– Make your home a place other kids want to be at.
– Parenting is hard work but it can bring reward 10 fold.
– Sometimes splurging is good
– If a son or daughter turns their back on you, don’t turn your back on them.
– All kids need to feel, see and hear the words I love you. As dads, we love our children so much that we cannot imagine that they would doubt it, but they need to be affirmed that we love them.
– Whatever your kid is involved in, be involved in as well.
– Kids need their dads to be their greatest cheerleader.
– Often times the best way to encourage your kids is not with words – a smile, thumbs up, and shake, hug, etc.
– Kids need their dad to throw away the porn.
– Stop and reflect before opening your mouth. If your child is rejoicing, rejoice with him/ her instead of saying they could do better; be careful before you get on them or react in a way inappropriate. Think before you speak because your words carry a lot of weight.
– Proverbs 25:11 – a word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in pictures of silver.
– Choose your words carefully and polish them before you say them.
– Accidents happen so don’t make a big deal out of it. If your kids spilled something, start cleaning it up but don’t yell about it. We want our kids to know that if something bad happens, dad can fix it and make it better. If you rage every time something happens, your kids will not want to tell you when something bad happens and you will not be able to help them.
– Parents are already superheroes, they just need to act like it.
– Hold high standards with your children, appropriate dress, etc.
– Be careful about giving ultimatums – what happens if you say “no tattoos or you will be kicked out of the house” and then your child gets a tattoo?
– Show your children how bad decisions result in bad consequences.
– Your children are a gift from God and God has equipped you to teach them and give them exactly what they need for life.
– As parents, we are so busy in life that many times we lose the joy of raising our children.
– Have a daddy daughter date night. And when you go, don’t be busy on your phone, talking to other people or thinking about other things, give your full attention to your daughter.
– A daughter needs a daddy dance with her, talk with her, and tell her you love her.
– A son needs a dad who will spar with him. Physically and maybe even literally a son should have a sparring partner – he needs to know how to protect, love his family and wife, be a gentleman, play sports, be tough, etc.
– Kids need their dad to set some ground rules at home.
– Be aware of what your kids deal with before they are ever mentioned or before they ever become a problem. To stay one step ahead of your kids, you need to spend time with them and know what is going on in their little minds.
– Put important days/events on your calendar to schedule it and also to show your children who they are what they do is important to you.
– The most well known Bible verse on parenting deals with anticipatory parenting (Proverbs 22:6 – train up a child in the way you should go and when he is old he will not depart from it). Teach your children to stay sexually pure before they go on their first date. Teach your children to abstain from alcohol and drugs before they are presented with it. Teach your children how to drive before they ever get behind the wheel. Teach your children about God and eternity before they are old.
– What can you help your kids do today in order to help them succeed tomorrow.
– Turn learning into a game.
– Kids need to know that you love your wife, there mom, and that you are committed to a lifelong relationship. Most of the kisses they will see on TV are unmarried people but they need to know that you could be committed for life to be/stay in love.
– One of the best things that dad can do for their kids is love his wife.
– Kids need their dad to respect their mom. Respect, common courtesy and communication are the basics that every husband should have with his wife.
– Kids need their dad to equip them for life without them. Yes, model the right attitude and decision patterns, but as they grow older you have to teach them and turn it over to God. God provides many methods for decision-making (the Bible, Christian leaders, their mother, etc.) so you must realize you’re not the only one who can make decisions for them, but you have to help them so they can learn how to make decisions. We are to prepare them for life, when we are out of their every day life.
– One of the greatest legacies you can leave for your children is love. If your kids get a bad grade, love them; if they get into trouble, love them; if they don’t do what you wish they would do, love them. Yes, discipline them, teach them, and help them, but don’t forget to love them. Make sure they know you love them for who they are, not for what they do.